Storytelling Nourishes Relationships

Guest contributor Cheryl Farrell writes about the power of sharing our stories to make human connections.

The word “storytelling” evokes images of children’s fairy tales, movie scripts, and even liner notes in financial reports. Back in the day, a young person tattling on a falsehood was heard in the phrase, “Mama, she told a story!” 

These days, in-person events, podcasts, and radio programs define storytelling as, “to communicate something personal that inspires others to feel and to think.” This objective comes to life in storytelling programs from The Moth, Public Radio’s Unheard LA, mental health advocate This Is My Brave, and independent story salons.

Storytelling for organizations is an adaptation I use when group members want to better connect with one another. By sharing personal stories, individuals learn they have more in common than just work similarities—beyond wearing the same company logo or sharing office space. Research originated by social psychologist Leon Festinger and later applied to work spaces says that group cohesiveness increases collaboration and productivity. That means, we can get the job done if we feel a kinship with one another. Sharing our personal stories also nourishes relationships.

What’s your story?

How likely are we to answer a text, an email, or a phone call if we know who is calling? That is, really know them. What if you know that Mary grows roses or Fran restores antiques just as you do? What if you know a colleague in a volunteer group cares for an elderly parent while raising young children, just as you do? The “what ifs” are vast when we share stories about our lives. 

The primal need to know if someone is a friend or foe may create inaccurate stories about people. Those imagined narratives are based on what we see or perceive. Examples are race, age, gender, physical ability, height, hair length, zip code, having children or not, and similar attributes. 

My long-time friend, Lilli Cloud is an executive branding expert. She posted a social media story describing her unexpected bias about the photograph of a young Black woman. Lilli is white. (She granted me permission to share her story.) The title, Why Equal Pay Day Is Not Equal was written March 15. The date symbolizes how far into the year women must work to earn what men earned by the end of the previous year. 

Lilli Cloud writes in an excerpt below. [Bold font by editor.]

I am one of Lilli Cloud’s Black friends. I am grateful for her candor and friendship. We can all learn more about ourselves when we take the opportunity to tell our stories. Let’s seek positive ways know each other better. And, let’s share the good.